Blackberry Winter: Chaplaincy and Dementia

This week for my Psychopathology course, we were required to read the play Blackberry Winter. I felt as if it was well constructed and gave me an interesting insight into the inside life of what happens to the family system when the aging parent reverts to a form of infancy – as it was stated in the play. Throughout the play, I continued to wonder, “How would I pastor Vivienne and would it be different than how I would be a chaplain for her?” My gut instinct tells me that they would be pretty similar. In the clinical setting, more often than not, people are verbalizing a desire to know the “why” to explain what they are going through. However, I find that something within my presence at the bedside allows them to move into another space. It becomes less about the “why” and more about the sharing of stories. With a disorder like dementia, I find that there is less of a ‘why’ attitude and more of a task orientation. I believe that the character in Blackberry Winter embodied this disposition, as well. In some ways, it seems to be easier – safer, maybe? – to stay within the logic of what needs to happen. This strikes me as interesting, given the disorder in and of itself is illogical. I’m also hyper-aware of the term used in Ministry with Persons with Mental Illness and Their Families to describe someone in Vivienne’s position – the ‘sandwich generation’. These are the folks who are simultaneously caring for the aging parent and the coming to age child. As pastor/chaplain, I’m wondering how to be fully present with Vivienne? How do I remain fully present with someone who doesn’t seem to be able to be fully present with themselves?

Secondly, how does one be pastor to the declining parent in this scenario? In Ministry with Persons, dementia is referred to as a “disease of old age”. As this is increasingly true, what is the pastoral response to bring with these folks? In my experience of being present with patient’s experiencing these symptoms, I find that I often question what makes my visit different than any other visit within the hospital and/or a social visit. I’m reflecting here on the time that I spent in a nursing home with my parent (who was an employee). I would regularly visit several ladies who told me the same stories, thought I was a grandchild or could recall just enough to remember that I was a stranger they enjoyed meeting. In both Ministry with Persons and Blackberry Winter, I am struck by the concept of complementary therapies. What is the current model for how we care for these patients? Does it vary across facility? Are there best practices? As someone who does not imagine being in a diagnostic setting – what is my role as pastor? As advocate? Is there a way to ritualize this type of decline in a worship setting?

That’s all I have for now.

In the Grip of God's Grace, 

Pastor Anitta +